I wake up today to find an audio send to my whatsapp, it's Asmaa again she would go to anyone who has a whatsapp in the village and ask them to let her send me an audio. it's always the same with her tiny voice "Hi teacher Merieme, how are you doing? I miss you so much". Asmaa is a pre school student that used to show up to school morning and afternoon even though she didn't have too, she's so smart and she knows she's cute, how can someone tell her no.
I miss her too and now that TAZARIN that lost village with no road seems so far and all the bad memories that happened there seems like they werern't that bad I miss all the good things I exprienced there.
I miss how every seasons was splendid with nature changing colors you don't notice that in a city:
FALL
leaves, getting know people, a lot of walking, almonds and amlou.
WINTER
Cold, seeing snow for the first time, and olive oil.
SPRING
A lot of roses, trips to imouzar a village nearby and nice weather.
SUMMER
Harvesting, ramadan, ftour at people's houses and goodbyes.
I miss my crazy students, since they weren't many I knew all of them from first grade to sixth grade plus moustami3at those pre schoolers that came to school to just play and run around the classrooms.
I hate to say it but I miss the trips in and out of TAZARIN, that hour and half of walking plus waiting for transportation,on that road, the girls and me, we went through all sorts of feelings, we sang, danced, cryed, were excited, happy, scared, sad, nervous just every possible state of mind.
Maybe next year I'll have to go back to TAZARIN, I don't know this time if I'll be strong enough to finish the year, I only wrote here the good things because it's all I want to remember from TAZARIN but I had there some really bad times that made me think of quitting a lot of times, life is hard there, I wish a better future for people there since they deserve one they were so good to us and generous and I'll never forget all the things they did for us.
Another year had passed, I'm 24 years old now. I was thinking about where I was last year around this time when I wrote the 23 post, I was living in a room just like where I'm living now, in a village just like the one where I am now and still a teacher a stressed out one that what ever she does still feels like she needs to be a better one, so it feels like nothing had changed, but certainly there is a lot of things that happened, that'll make sure to note in this post so I don't forget that when i was 23 I met some incredible people and did some things good or bad that made me grow:
February 2017:
I was living at a room in this village called "TANRAT", it was my first month working as a teacher, the room was kind of empty and everything was on the ground, but I grew to like it, it was My room I never had one before, it was a dream coming true, living alone cooking for myself. I was stressing out a bit because of all the people I had to know, all the names I had to remember.
I don't remember what was this huge smile for!
March 2017:
This month was awfull, I was suffering with class management, my students which were 6 graders and were way older than to be in that grade, some were 16 and even 17 years old, were really disrespecting me, and like anyone new at a job I asked for help, and my principle did what he thought was the best to help me, he beat and helled at them, in front of me, I felt so bad that I decided that I had to deal with my students by myself, and it was hard, I was trying different techniques, all I could find on the internet I tried, and things were getting better I was gaining some of my students respect, and during all this I had friends that were there anytime I needed someone to talk with and that conforted me a lot.
My students really liked drawing
Thinking about what I did to deserve this
Flowers that my students gave me
April 2017:
I went back home for the spring break, two month without seeing mom felt like eternity, me who complain about her all the time I missed her so much. back to school I discovered that I'll be moving to teach in another village, since I was not experienced enough to teach in the school where I was, I felt so angry that no one cared about the kids who had to change the teacher for the third time, or about the improvement I was making with them.
By mid april I was in a new village "Zaouit" living with a women and her kid, I wished I was living on my own but I didn't have a choice, in my new house some days were better then others.
The house were I was living was old and big with an open roof, it had all kinds of insects plus a turtle, chicken, cats and my favourites rats.
May 2017:
life was good, I was working hard to be a better teacher, I went home whenever I had the chance too, and something really awsome happened during this month, I met one of my dearest friends now, Liz a peace corps volunteer from the USA, we had so much in common, we talked a lot and we still do. we agreed to start a girls empowerment club in the village, and during May we had our first meeting with the girls.
June 2017:
This month was hell, Ramadan started, and the erea where my village is, is really famous for it's hot weather, it was HELL, I had never expienced anything like that, plus with fasting it was impossible, I had no energy to teach or do anything else, I was relived when school ended.
July 2017:
The first half of this month was fun, I went to Rabat the capitel for the first time, met some really awsome people, I visited my sister in Mohammadia where she lives, and spent a day in Casablanca where I met some of my friends after two years of not seeing them. the last two weeks of july were boring I went back home and started studying from an exam I had in the beginning of august.
At the the contemporary art museum
August 2017: I had to go back to TATA for my exam, it was so hot there that I coudn't sleep nor eat, it just made remember how lucky I am to be living in Agadir were the weather is always nice. I did good in my exam, but I coudn't be that happy about it, I expirenced during the time I was in TATA my first heartbreak and it was awfull, is there worst than one sided love? ... yes there is: famine, climate change and the heat in Tata, so I knew I'll survive.
At my cousin's wedding
September 2017:
This month was the beginning of a new adventure, since life gave me a two months break, I was sent me and a bench of other teachers to teach in a new region, far from Tata, we were happy since IDA OUTANANE our new region, was closer to our family houses us who came from Agadir. we were happy until they told us about the villages where we were assigned to go, some of us were more lucky than the others, as for me I was part of the unlucky ones, my village had no road and no market. donkeys became my favorites animals, but still my experience in here is so interesting, I live with two nice teachers we face together the hardships of living in here with mostly a smile on our face.
October 2017:
We were getting used to the life in Tazarin, I was teaching two grades at the same time, since there was only, three of us and six grades to teach. it was hard and it is still hard but I love my students here and I'm doing my best. During october we celebrated the International day of the girl with our students, we sang, played, draw, made friendship bracelets and also had a deep conversation about girl's education.
November 2017:
Life in the village was the same, between our room and the classrooms, trying to make it work with what I have. I trully wanted to give everthing I can to those kids and one of those things was to create a library for them.a friend with whom I used to talk a lot about the conditions in my village wanted to help me, and during his vistit to Agadir he got me some books to start the library, I was so happy about the books, and so grateful that he cared.
December 2017:
December was really beautifull in Tazarin, it wasn't yet cold and the outside was so beautifull, I was reading The Forty Rules of Love by ELIF SHAFAK which was so good, and we also got the chance to go home a lot.
January 2018:
January was awsome in every possible way well there were some few incidents but I'll act like they didn't happen, so first there was the Amazigh new year that we celebrated with the people of the village, then the visite of an association to our school which so fun and finally my visit to Zaouit where I visited my friend Liz and organized the GLOW camp.
so that was my year, I do feel old with everything that happened it, who knows where life will take me this year!
